piles

Clearly I have struggling at life lately.

Since Joni and Friends, I have not stopped. I returned home and went straight to work. I worked long days and went straight to Milwaukee with my cousin Laura for her bone marrow donation surgery. When I got home from that, at 11:30 pm on Sunday night, I got up and went straight to work by 8 am Monday morning. After working all week, that weekend, it became evident Laura wasn't healing properly and the next week every free moment was spent trying to help her through her pain, helping her to the bathroom at night while she sobbed and the even sleeping in a chair at the hospital while the doctors tried to help her and figure out what the issue was.

Then music and drama camp happened and I spent the week with 35 kiddos who challenged me at every end. From camp, I went straight to work at the mission each day until midnight. 

Suffice it to say, I am exhausted, and my goals and obedience have been nonexistent. My life has just piled around me as I have run in all these crazy directions. 

This morning, I resolved to stop the insanity and start the obedience. One of the most basic steps of obedience that I had been neglecting, is to start each day in prayer, on. my. knees. 

This morning, when the alarm rang off, I went to slide out of bed to my knees and met with the piles of laundry and crap that are next to my bed. I realized what a picture of the current place of my life this is. 

I've let things pile up and get in the way of obedience. I've let my life overwhelm me to the point that there was no room for what is greater, for what I KNOW Jesus has asked of me. I have put off for "tomorrow" and surrendered to a state of survival instead of thriving. 

So I have no idea what tomorrow will look like or the next day. I know the piles won't move themselves magically from my life either literally or figuratively. But today, I choose obedience. I'm checking things off the list. I'm meeting my goals and walking the path Jesus has wanted me on all along. 


I will not be perfect but He didn't ask me for perfection, He asked me for obedience.

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