afriad


I tend toward being rather fearless and gutsy about trudging through tough parts of town or encountering drug dealers or pimps hassling me clients. But today something strange happened to me. 

Yesterday I was alerted to the news that an on and off client of mine had been murdered. Worse yet, it was by another on and off client who we knew to struggle with mental health and intense outbursts. Today, I was made aware of another situation where a young girl that has been an on and off client with her mom since I have worked in the shelter, was kidnapped and sexually assaulted. 

After my encounter last week in the park and these two stories today I was faced with something I wasn't used to at all. Deep, intense, nearly paralyzingly fear. 

I had to walk down through a tough part of town to a health clinic to pick up a prescription. I suppose I could have driven but I usually enjoy the walk.

Today however, I was jumpy and unsettled. Every time I sensed person walking behind me, I would clock in mind how I walk call 911 if something happened. This is not usually my mindset at all. 

I have to admit, this frustrated me to no end. 

I couldn't control it. I couldn't make it stop.

I know it was warfare. I know it was the enemy trying to play in my mind to take away a confidence that I have in the Lord. I know that I am invincible until I have fulfilled my purpose. I know that know one can touch me without His permission. I know that He knows all things and works them all together for my good. 


Reminded my unsettled heart, "when I am afraid I will put my trust in Him."

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